Saying Farewell, A Miserable Joy

"There is no other labor in all the world that brings to a human heart, judging from my own personal experience, more joy, peace and serenity than proclaiming the gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ."
Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: Heber J. Grant

Elder Alex Jesse Cole

Sacramento, California

Serving the People of Hmong

I have procrastinated this post because it was painful to see these pictures for a while. It still is, but not in the same way. My sister's first baby, Alex, was my first baby too. I still think of him as the little trouble making kid that I loved so much, it is difficult to comprehend that he is 20 years old and serving a mission. Kimm ~ and Chainey ~ have done an outstanding job in raising this handsome young man. I hope I have expressed this to Kimm. I have always been so proud of how she always put Alex's needs first, when she was married to his dad, Sean, when she was a divorced, single mom and when she found her true love, Chainey. Kimm never put aside Alex's needs for her own. That is a great accomplishment when given less than ideal circumstances.

To my dear sister: I love you and your family. Thank you for not being afraid to break the mold and open doors for us all. I appreciate how you always kept Alex's two-part family intact. I love how you are his best friend and best mom. I love how you love your children. Congratulations, my sister, you have done well.

I love you.

Alex was baptized after Kimm became active again in the church. Kimm's situation is similar to mine. We are not the "typical" Mormon family. I like to think of Kimm and I as "First Generationers" ~ even though we come from some pretty sturdy stock of Latter Day Saints. That said, Alex was not taught from the day he was born that he was to go on a mission. For a long time, I am not sure it was even mentioned. The decision to dedicate two years of his life in service of the Lord came to Alex after much thought and prayer. It was his choice, and I think it was a hard one, especially when he was leaving a girlfriend of two plus years and a Mama he loves dearly. Not to mention the rest of his FABULOUS family.

I do not know what is like to say goodbye to a child for two years, I have tried to support my sister in any way and to just to love Alex in my own "special" way. (I drive him nuts!!)

Alex's farewell talk was that of a seasoned missionary. After hearing him speak, I do not think anyone questioned whether he was making the right decision. I distinctly remember my sweet friend, Lanae, who was kind enough to come, say, "WOW. What a sacrifice."
Wow indeed. And it is a sacrifice, but one that will reap blessings his whole life.
Kimm was not really in the mood for pictures, but I know these will be ones to treasure. I hope she feels the blessings of raising and sending off a missionary.

Chainey usually has a lot to say, but this day was quiet one for him. Alex is his son and Chainey has been an excellent example of unconditional love and a great dad. To use Alex's words, "Chainey, you rock!"

Kimm and Chainey look miserable!

Why do I look so happy?? I'm not.

Grandpa Russell and Grandma Diane have been very supportive of Alex's Mission call. Sure, Dad tried to send lottery tickets and beer the first week Alex was in the MTC, but it was out of love. I know Diane has cried tears of her own for her first grand baby.

Taylor was not able to make it to Alex's farewell talk in church and had Kimm and Alex fooled that he wasn't coming at all, but he did ~ obviously after this picture was taken.

I loved how Alex and his sweetheart, Krista, enjoyed every minute together.

(I have to take credit for this little hook up ~ even though I really don't deserve it. Krista is my dear friend, Beth Hill's, daughter)

Susan Walker, Beth Hill and me. Friends forever, as cheesy as that sounds.

Alex has had to put up with all these girls and they LOVE to torment him.

Don't you just love this picture?

There is Uncle Taylor, and he is as proud as the rest of us.

This is part of the Hill gang.

(L-R Krista, Justin, Julie and Beth)

Family photo time. Don't we look like we belong in the Ensign?

Oh, wait, maybe not.

Maddy and Mariah. Kimm and I have threatened both of them with their lives to not even THINK about serving a mission.

Alex and his favorite girls.

Alex was one to lean on that day for feelings of joy, even when others felt miserable.

Kimm described the whole process perfectly of preparing and sending a missionary off:

IT IS A MISERABLE JOY.

They make a very cute couple.

After all the guest left, we were able to loosen up a bit, talk and watch Alex open his gifts and cards. They all were so touching and generous.

It filled my heart to hear what others had to say to and about Alex.

Even though Alex wasn't leaving for 2 days, my family chose this day to say our goodbyes. I wanted to leave seeing Alex happy, smiling and surrounded by his family. But I didn't really want to say goodbye at all. Neither did Bella, it took a bit of convincing for her to give Alex any kind of send off.

When I reminded her that we have big plans to go to Disneyland after Alex's mission is completed, there was no problem getting her and Anna to give him hugs and kisses.

At this point, Katie has taken to hiding behind her blankie and Chainey.

This was a very difficult moment with tears from everyone. Katie refused to say goodbye to Alex and just silently cried.

Maddy was ready to give loves, but when she started to cry, Alex's response was, "I didn't think she cared!!"

I cry every time I see this picture. Maddy added the words and has it hung in her locker.

I don't think any joy was felt at this moment. Miserable describes this picture.

Farewell, Alex. I am so proud of you. I think of you every single day.

I love you.

Always.

Aunt Selina